(If this video is too long, I'll cut it in two and post it all same day)
Never takes long. I've just been up out of bed for a few minutes, sit down to read Facebook, and here someone is offering me advice. I feel irritated because it's more like control than it is advice. When advice is offered under the Power Over Others system, it's not advice, it's control. And I can see this person is not about to stop trying to control me, because he's insistent he's right. He thinks he knows what's better for me than I do. This is not a person I feel like making myself vulnerable with, because if they're so into their own righteousness, I can see where making myself vulnerable would make me wrong in his eyes. This would set me up for being judged and rejected. I can also see this may gear up to an argument, and I don't argue with others. I also insist on being left alone to do my own thing; there is a block button that works to make sure I am left alone to my own judgment, not yours, so I used it.
I don't spend my time explaining myself to controllers. I suggest you don't either.
Stop telling people what to do!!! How many times do I have to repeat this?! People don't want to be told what to do. Unless they specifically ask you, don't offer them advice. Maybe you do know better. When the time is right, they'll ask you. How much advice has been given randomly only to find it not followed? You can't put the cart before the horse. The horse has to get to a certain point before they will understand or can follow your direction. That's when you give them advice – when they ask!!
If you guys think I'm so spiritually advanced, it's because these little details mean a lot to me. I learned them and I practice them.
I'd originally put the post up for the sake of humour, nothing more. And I'm still convinced that relating to others electronically is bullshit. Face to face is the only way to relate to another person.
What part of, “I'm off carbs. I am kicking my sugar habit and honey would be part of that,” says, “Go ahead and offer her more of your wisdom? Keep insisting, she'll give in.” How sensitive are you to responses you get from other people? Clearly not very.
What part of “no” don't people hear in what I say? Why don't they hear the word “no”? Do I have to be rude and say, “I don't want your help,” right from the get go? Maybe I will then. I have all the celestial help I need. Why would I take it from anyone on earth?
I said that I don't do carbs. I'm trying to kick my sugar habit (and it's really working by the way. I feel a lot better already!) and he comes back with the name of a book I put him onto and how the author insists we eat honey. Sure, eating honey. Let me see. I'm a bingeing sugar addict. I've eaten the entire jar in one sitting. And that's not all a real sugar addict can do. A real sugar addict will drive around after work, jonesing for something to shut out her pain. She will drive to grocery stores and pick up Christmas cookies, a whole box, stop at the ice cream section and buy a big box of ice cream, drive around to the donut shop and get a dozen donuts, then she'll go up to the hamburger place and get a burger and fries and then make sure she gets dessert there too. If she doesn't think that's enough, she may make more stops, maybe at the chocolate shop. Then she will go home and start binge eating. She'll stuff herself to the point she can't even think anymore. Turns out, I found out years later that when when you do that, in fact you're shunting most of the blood away from your brain to go to your stomach to digest all you've eaten, so it does bring on a state of relative passivity.
Oh yes, the next thing is at some point, probably hours later, she will get up in disgust and throw all the food away. She'll trash herself out verbally, being absolutely disgusted at what she's done to herself, plus the total waste of money to consider. She'll go to bed. And the next day after work she'll do it again, completely forgetting yesterday and how disgusted she was with herself.
I've never been like that again. After that point in my life, I moved to London, where I was treated considerably better, and although I still used sugar to mood alter, I never used it to that extent again. I taught myself how to be assertive instead and to speak up, and that helped to curb the addiction, but I still have it.
This was me, years ago when I was working at my first job where I was constantly abused. I'd do anything except face my feelings, because I was taught by my parents not to. My parents were also addicted, but not to this extreme. Addictions work in two ways: you either binge, going on rampages of booze, drugs or sugar, or you're a dependent, who never really overdoes it but always seems to have a cigarette or a drink in your hand especially when you feel anxious or feel really anything at all, just to take the edge off. I have been both, addicted in many different areas. If you think someone is overweight, you have no idea what they're eating that you never see.
For many people, advice is thinly disguised control. When you don't stop when I politely tell you that I don't eat honey, why is it so hard for you to understand that I might know myself a bit better than you do, or that I would choose to override something an author said in a book, probably because they've never been sugar addicted like I've been. In the 12 steps, it is established early on who our higher power is, and we answer to that higher power only, nobody else. If it's God, then it's God. Some people choose otherwise. When you have your higher power established, it's easy to see who is vying to usurp it, and then you have to deal with them appropriately.
I realize that in the Matrix people have been taught to be boundary violators. But when I say, “No,” I mean it. Few people listen when others say no. I've watched children saying no to their parents and the parents just going and doing whatever they want with them, whether they like it or not. I've been on the receiving end of that as well.
It's not funny. When someone says no, listen. Why do you always have to put your needs first? This is the problem on this planet. Your need to be nice, your need to give advice, your need to tell others what you know, whatever your need is. Sometimes it's not appreciated and you have to listen to see if people want to hear what you have to say. That takes humility. Precious few of us have it. As for this video, if you want to hear it, then listen. If you don't, then stop listening. That's how you exercise your free will.
Ivo: You have worked hard throughout your life, my love, to tighten up boundaries that were catastrophic at the outset. So many people have aided you in this quest by threatening more abuse. You put them in their place. London was not entirely the sanctuary you speak of – there were abusive people on the Tube as well as that perverted character in Hyde Park.
Me: True. If there's a pervert around, he'll find me.
Ivo: You screamed at him to, “Get the fuck out of here,” when he inched himself within an inch of your backside. After following you around. He did not expect that.
Me: I didn't expect him.
Ivo: But you dealt with him.
Me: London was a lot better than Niagara Falls was. Considerably better.
Ivo: You have worked at shoring up your boundaries to allow your higher self to express herself on this planet. This means you must experience so many situations to become very aware of what healthy behaviour is and what isn't. Quite often, controlling is carried out in the name of advice giving.
Me: I remember they used to go on about that in Codependents Anonymous.
Ivo: Those who tell others what to do are those who believe themselves to be the higher power of the one they tell what to do.
Me: Seems to me I may have put the book he was talking about up in a post, but I didn't tell anyone to buy it. I put up the post and say how I liked it, which is the 12 step way. I don't tell people what to buy unless they seem open to a suggestion. I'm not open to anyone's suggestions. Period. I listen to my higher self, my soul, Ivo, Athena, Ashtar, whoever.... I don't plan to continue to behave as they do on this planet. And part of the reason I do this is so I can pass on what I've learned to you.
There are many people who channel higher entities with etheric messages, but the fact of the matter is, many people don't even have basic healthy boundaries in place. That's what I've found. On top of the bounty of addictive behaviours I see people behaving in, they also have boundaries that reflect the Matrix, not healthy spiritual living.
Ivo: This is true, my love.
Me: I want to ask everyone listening to this, “How much longer do you plan to stay in the Matrix?” How much? Because controlling behaviours like this will guarantee you're one of the small pockets left of a crumbling timeline. And it will guarantee that you will have a painful ascension path to 5D. You need to get serious about what we're telling you. These are the rudiments of Matrix behaviour. You need to root out every possible way you see yourself trying to control other people. And really, when it comes to control, are you going to take responsibility for their lives if what you badgered them into doing doesn't work out for them?
Suppose I did go back to eating large amounts of carbs, like I did when I was in my late 20's? Suppose I did? Is this person who started insisting honey is the way to go (perhaps he's even a foodie himself and he doesn't realize it?) is this person going to take responsibility for my life? For the horrible blunder I would have made?
Perhaps this person is a foodie, now that I think of it. Addicts have an amazing capacity for rationalization and the one thing they can rationalize very readily is increasing their supply. In the same way that one jar of honey isn't enough, two or three, even four on sale and stored in the house “because it was a bargain” is what an addict will do to ensure their supply. With addictions, you have to have a good bullshit detector and you have to learn to call yourself on your own lies.
The fact is, you are always responsible for your own life. Always. If you let someone control you into doing something, they are still not responsible for you – you are. You are the one who will bear the consequences of your actions, not them. That is universal law.
I deal with a lot of people doing this work. I know you guys follow me, either for these lessons or to hear about the Storm, or extraterrestrial activities around earth. I channel on many subjects. You have to see it from my perspective. I care about everyone. There isn't anyone on this earth, not one person, that I wouldn't jump into freezing waters to save. I'd put my own life at risk for anybody. Call me a dumb ass, I don't care, I'd still do it. What do you think I'm doing now, for that matter? It's not like they haven't already tried to kill me. They don't want me doing this work. My hope is that everyone on this planet can learn to live peacefully and happily soon. But dealing with you when you constantly violate my boundaries is exasperating! I have to go through a forgiveness process sometimes daily. I realize that living here has never met my needs. I have a need to just have a conversation with another person and not have to do battle with their controlling nature or out of control ego, and I've seldom ever met anyone outside of the 12 steps where I could have this level of relaxation in a conversation. Seldom. I know I don't fit in here. I never have. I've always experienced people as overwhelming. Now I just don't. Like we were saying, I avoid the loops. I'll talk to someone only as long as the conversation is pleasant and productive, otherwise I'm out.
The Twelve Steps has taught me to pray for the people who offend. Pray for their health, wealth and happiness. So I will. And not to focus on how annoyed you are. I get annoyed because what they've done is just another reminder I'm living on the wrong planet and my needs will never be met here. Few can meet them. Those who do, I love you. I have needs and things I wanted from life but they never materialized. I consider this life somewhat of an exception, even extraordinary. I've gone through life trying to follow “the formula” for happiness and only found pain and disillusionment. So, I'm making the best out of it and trying to create a new world from what I've learned is wrong with the old one.
If you want to know your soul, become autonomous, experience Christ Consciousness, ascend, etc. stop trying to control other people!! It's that simple. Try it for a week. No advice. Scrutinize yourself to see when you're feeling insecure by what someone has said.
Learn to understand what triggers your ego into action.
Ask yourself, “What am I trying to gain from this conversation?” Is it a pleasant exchange, or is it the satisfaction of feeling you one-upped someone, which is a short satisfaction indeed. Are you in the conversation to be competitive or cooperative? Are you in it to create peace or to create war? Which is it? Are you there to tell them what to do or to simply offer a suggestion that they can take or leave? What attracted you to that post? What are you thinking you can get out of it? What are you thinking when you leave a comment?
You have to scrutinize your intentions, always! Also, understand your moods and that they tempt you to fall short of your best intentions.
Ask yourself: “What will my comments or behaviour lead to?” If I keep insisting, how do I expect her to respond? Am I looking for validation from her when I should learn to validate myself, and when I should learn to recognize when I'm in the wrong? Do I recognize there is no shame in being wrong and do I treat others accordingly? Do I understand that being wrong is just a part of the learning process and that there is no shame in not knowing?
Is it someone acting vulnerable that attracts you? Maybe they don't know something? Does this raise your periscope into thinking that it's time to attack?
Is it when someone does something you feel is wrong? Does that get your attention? Does that make you want to attack them? Do you have to smash that laugh emoji and ridicule the poster?
Or are you on social media to inform yourself and to pass on posts to others? Honestly? That's your only motivation? That's good then. You can pass over others who vote for the other party, you can pass over comments that don't agree with your take on things without starting or joining in on a fight.
Or do you go into groups in order to control them? Worse, do you react to trolls? Why?
Or is it just when someone expresses an opinion? Does that make you want to get into an argument with them?
Is it when you think you can add your opinion or information to a conversation? Do you express yourself as your being right and that's the only way it possibly can be? Do you have to make others wrong? Yes, the whole world has to be wrong because I'm the only one who's right?
Or are you a real coward and wait to see who's dominating an argument and then side up with them regardless of your opinion?
Do you feel this is something you know about and you can advise them of? Did they ask you for advice or are you just butting in where it's not your business? One of my niece's friends butted into a conversation I was having with her the other day. I told this woman I'm her aunt and she needs to mind her own business. That's one thing I hate about social media: any busybody can join your conversation whether they're invited or not. How many strangers do you let sit with you at the coffee shop? People you don't even know? One? Two? Ten? Hundreds? No? You've never done that? Then what's up with social media allowing it. For someone like me who experiences overwhelm around others, social media is a bloody nightmare.
Do you assume that everyone's boundaries are the same as yours are and they'll never tell you no? That everything you do is okay? Oh boy! You're in for a rude surprise!
Do you assume for yourself, telling yourself, “Oh, they won't mind.” That's why you should ask first.
Do you misconstrue the conversation and twist it so that you can come out smelling like a rose?
Have you ever thought about how annoying your ego can be to other people? Is that what you want? To be right or to be liked? Are these the only choices you give yourself in life? Do you feel that to be liked you have to be wrong? Or do you think you're so flawed that you always have to be right? It's an appearance you have to keep up.
Watch your ego. See when you get this irresistible urge to jump in. Do you give people credit or do you just think everyone else is stupid and you're the only smart one?
Do you pass on nobody's posts but your own?
Or do you hang out on others' posts so you can flog your own posts? Do you think they won't notice? Do you agree with others so you can promote your own work?
Ivo: Intention is everything, my love.
Me: And some of us get it. We can sniff out your intentions because we can sense them. Some people are so obvious. They're so fake. I get people who hang out on my posts and put links up to their work. They think that I'm so followed that doing this will get them ahead. It won't. I'm also heavily shadow banned, so only about 25 people get my posts at a time. If it gets likes, they'll send out a few more. I only have about 150 friends on my friends list and I don't take friend requests. I save friends for people who supply me with intel and I pass that on.
Same as youtube. I have almost 6,000 followers and get a thousand views per video. This guy who cleans leaves out of sewer drains on the eastern seaboard of the States sometimes gets over a million views of his videos.
Ivo: That is shadow banning.
Me: Now they're going into my computer to pull out my files before I create the video.
Ivo: You must keep going, my love, you have not reached your zenith yet.
Me: I know. Anyway, folks. Be humble and ask people first if they want your advice. You might be surprised to see what they're thinking. Not everyone thinks like you do.
We have to keep working on ways to get along better with others. It's that simple.
Ivo: Earthlings will get there, someday. They will understand. They will transcend their ego's.
Scrutinizing your intentions takes the competition out of your conversations with others and creates an air of cooperation. Anybody would feel more valued knowing that you are intent on meeting them halfway instead of bowling them over with your words.
Ivo: Self mastery on earth is difficult, my love, but at the moment especially, very important.
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